Goo Goo Gah Gah!

It’s been a few years since I’ve been surrounded by babies, so I’m a bit out of the loop when it comes to new, gimmicky ways to make the little ones eat.

For example, a couple of months ago I saw a mom pulling a multi-pak of squeezable applesauce out of her bag and then pass around the tubes to other toddler moms at the playground.

“So, there’s an interesting idea,” I thought. “A nice healthy snack for kids-on-the-go!” (Because what kid isn’t going somewhere at all times these days, right?)

I’ll give these moms the benefit of the doubt, and assume that when they’re at home, they make some kind of effort to teach their offspring how to use actual utensils. Because, judging by how the playground kids were consuming these, it looked like they were sucking on a bottle. I wonder what the developmental specialists and occupational therapists would say about this trend. I was roundly criticized by an OT when my son was still drinking from a sippy-cup at age three.

While I can kind of understand the appeal of food from a tube if you’re a small child or a harried mom, can someone please explain why older kids and (gasp!) adults are drawn to what seems to be a growing trend in the confection aisle? 

What would compel a sentient individual to purchase a container of goo? What could possibly be enjoyable about it? I love the Icee (and its better known competitor, the Slurpee), but the appeal of those items is that they’re cool and refreshing. They quench your thirst in a fun way.  Why would anyone think squirting a shot of the Icee’s raw flavor material into her mouth (warm, mind you) is a good idea?

I found a review of the product on a blog, which seemed to make no mention of the fact that this is just weird! (He likes the Cherry and the Blue Raspberry flavors but not green because “green sucks.” Okay. I’ll give  him that.)

But if squirting sickeningly-sweet fruit-flavored gel from a tube that resembles toothpaste is not your thing, why not try squeezable marshmallows? Thank goodness!  They’ve finally come up with a solution to the annoying problem called “chewing”!

Maybe I’m just a purist, but I prefer my candy in solid form. Perhaps they’ll come up with compelling evidence which proves that goo is less harmful for your teeth. If that’s the only benefit, well….it’s a completely lame one!

In fact, I have to stop writing about this now because it’s making me gag.

GAH!

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Filed under Candy, Product Reviews

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